Arguments can be made that Kanye West is the GOAT in many areas (producing, rapping, fashion). What isn’t debatable is the fact that Kanye West is the GOAT when it comes to pettiness. No person in history has reached consistent levels of pettiness on a global scale quite like Kanye. A mogul who is allergic to giving a fuck about consequences. Yeezy will not hesitate to put his reputation, livelihood, fame, or fortune on the line to prove a point.
It’s easy to hate, but come on, how can you not love a man who truly doesn’t give a fuck? Famous people with money are terrified to lose it, Kanye puts his life on the line weekly for minor grievances.
Like America, he is unbelievably petty, vindictive, and toxic, but always entertaining. Rather than working on his faults, he has embraced them and made them worse. He is an icon who blurs the line between self-aware and delusional, confident and arrogant, insane and genius. People are quick to call him crazy but his proclamations frequently become facts. The more you hate, the more powerful he becomes.
Let’s have a toast to the douchebags, the assholes, the scumbags, the toxic kings, by celebrating the GOAT’s most petty moments.
Kanye Publicly Embarrasses Kid Cudi at Rolling Loud 2022
In case you didn’t know, Kanye hates his former BFF Kid Cudi for being friends with Pete Davidson. The latest man giving dick to his ex-wife and legendary whore Kim Kardashian. Cudi didn’t support Pete publicly but anything less than a “FUCK YOU SKETE” tweet in Kanye’s world means you are an opp and need to find God.
Being Kanye’s friend must be exhausting. I’m guessing Cudi got a phone call on a random Wednesday at 4 AM, “HEY MAN IT’S KANYE. FUCK PETE DAVIDSON I NEED YOU TO FLOOD THE SOCIALS WITH TRUTH FROM GOD. THIS IS GODS WILL” And Cudi’s like, “What? Bro why are you telling me this? I don’t care, please just keep me out of it. Are we still recording tomorrow?” And then Kanye tries to ruin Cudi’s career for being disloyal.
Kanye pulled out of Rolling Loud 2022, who replaced him with his onetime friend-turned-nemesis Kid Cudi. In typical Ye’ fashion, he pulled out late, knowing that most of the fans had bought tickets for him. The crowd was packed with angry Kanye stans who were all too happy to let out their frustrations by throwing plastic water bottles at Cudi. Cudder only lasted 4 songs.
Not satisfied with Cudi’s public embarrassment, Kanye joined Lil Durk onstage later that night, again, after PULLING OUT OF THE FESTIVAL FOR “PERSONAL REASONS”, to perform “Father Stretch my Hands pt. 1”, his most famous track featuring Kid Cudi.
I’m all for revenge but holy shit dude. Indirectly orchestrating a “hate Cudi” convention and then tapdancing on his grave once he fails? That’s beyond petty. Kanye was saying, in no uncertain terms, “I am the GOAT. You will never be as famous or loved as me. I only showed up to prove this point. Your songs are only good when I make them.”
While I love Cudi, he most certainly did not deserve the treatment he got at Rolling Loud 2022, he had to know this was coming. You don’t fuck with the pettiest man alive (also one of the most famous men alive) and not expect a colossal clap back. He also severely underestimated how psychotic Kanye stans are. And you don’t trust the organizers of Rolling Loud, they are incompetent dipshits who invite this type of controversy every year. They want rappers to shoot at each other and get arrested because it means more press for them.
Twisting the Knife on Poor Cudi
Skete and Kim broke up 2 weeks later and Kanye posted a fake obituary for the comedian with a “Kid Cudi meant to play funeral but fearful of bottle throwers” at the bottom. Kanye went trolled Pete Davidson so hard that it forced him into trauma therapy.
Calculated, ruthless, and above all else, petty. Kanye becoming a billionaire and learning new revenge tactics from his new billionaire psychopath friends is turning his acts of pettiness into genuine works of art. No longer happy with simply embarrassing people, he now has to psychologically and financially ruin them.
The “Famous” Phone conversation with Taylor Swift
Kanye West and Taylor Swift’s paths have been weirdly intertwined ever since he interrupted her VMA Awards speech in 2009 (more on that later). Any time there is a superstar threatening to take attention away from Kanye (that isn’t named Jay-Z or Beyonce) he’s almost guaranteed to take it personally.
On TLOP, Kanye was in full-blown manic mode. There were eyebrow-raising bars all over this thing. Including this gem off “FAMOUS”, “I feel like me and Taylor might still have sex, why? I made that bitch famous.”
It was hilarious and absurd in a way only Kanye can be, but also openly disrespectful to America’s sweetheart. Taylor was upset at first and took a vague swipe at Yeezus during her Grammy acceptance speech. It was an easy story to write, just another example of Kanye bullying little ol’ innocent Taylor.
OR WAS IT? Kim K posted a Snapchat video showing Kanye previewing the track to Taylor who approved it. The conversation is surprisingly loving and lighthearted. Kanye says multiple times “friendship is more important than a rap line” which is a bald-faced lie. Kanye has openly admitted that nothing is more important than him or his music.
Taylor could no longer claim to be the victim in the situation. She had made a career of being a “nice person”, a celebrity who miraculously didn’t do those shitty things that every other celebrity does. And we wanted to believe.
She tried to change the narrative and say that the line itself didn’t bother her but took issue with Kanye calling her a “bitch”. It was too little too late. Kanye had brought America’s perfect daughter down into the mud with him. The first real stain on her reputation.
Taylor confirmed all of this in her Netflix MISS AMERICANA documentary, “When people decided I was wicked and evil and conniving and not a good person,” she said to her mom, “that was the one that I couldn’t really bounce back from because my whole life was centered around it.”
Wasting a God-Tier Beat to “Scoopity Poop” Drake
I’m not sure what started the Kanye/Drake battle other than their two egos being so massive that they struggle to share the same zip code. It doesn’t matter at this point, the beef has taken on a life of its own and given us HOF content over the years. The “Lift Yourself” saga is so hilariously petty that if it wasn’t Kanye you wouldn’t believe it.
Both artists have been petty to the core. With Kanye saying on Drink Champs that Drake has taken the more psychological, calculated route moving in “5 blocks away” and DM-ing “every single girl in your family/around your family”. Drake does it on the DL because he is a pop star with an image to maintain. Kanye is too, he just doesn’t care.
They were literally on the verge of a reunion with Kanye reaching out to Drake. Ye poured his heart out and told Drake that he wants to reconcile, offering to help produce his new album. Kanye invited Drake and his longtime producer Noah “40” Shebib out to Wyoming where they…worked on Kanye songs for his album Ye. They left with one Drake song, “Lift Yourself”. Drake felt somewhat bamboozled but happy that they at least reconciled and were making music together again.
Drake also confided in Kanye. Looking up to him as a mentor/big brother. He told him about his baby mama drama, his family, and his album release date. Really personal, intimate details of his life. Kanye took all of that trust and weaponized it against poor Aubrey.
Following their meeting, Kanye dropped release dates for his “7 song album” summer (Pusha T, Nas, Teyana Taylor, Kids See Ghosts) that were all around or on the date Drake’s SCORPION was supposed to drop. Not only that, but he released the one song they did together “Lift Yourself”, for free with him rapping the “poopity scoop de poop” gibberish just so Drake could never have it.
He embarrassed himself and rearranged his whole release schedule just to spite Drake. I know it seems like I agree with Kanye in this article because I find him so entertaining, but this is a colossal dick move. Taking advantage of Drake’s vulnerability just to prove a point is some evil shit.
Giving Pusha-T Ammunition to Humiliate Drake
I will preface this by saying it is UNCONFIRMED, but this is the narrative from black Twitter which I trust more than Kanye himself. Drake also alluded to it during The Shop interview (above), speculating that Pusha T knew all of the fucked up things about his son because Kanye spilled the beans.
Allegedly, Kanye got Drake to confide in him and then turned around and gave that information directly to ruthless 757 MC and one of Drake’s biggest haters, Pusha T. What unfolded was nothing short of a massacre. Pusha baited Drake with a light diss on Infrared, Drake got in his feelings, took the bait, and released Duppy Freestyle. Then Pusha dropped a nuclear bomb that shook up the whole industry.
It was a bummer. The Pusha/Drake beef was shaping up to be a really fun back and forth but quickly turned into a PR disaster for Drizzy with Kanye in the back laughing like the Joker. This diss track was so bad Drake’s didn’t respond with a diss but an apology for the photo Pusha used for the song. It was so bad that Drake questioned if he wanted to even rap anymore and started making dance music.
It put Drake in an impossible position. If he responded in kind, he’d have to attack Kanye and stoop to his level which would hurt his squeaky clean image. If he does nothing, he’s weak. An imitator. Aubrey Graham the actor instead of Drake the Meek Mill slayer.
There was too much quality information in Pusha’s diss. There had to be a mole. It’s never been confirmed that Kanye gave him the information, but I think we can all safely assume he did.
I’MMA LET YOU FINISH
Who could forget the most Kanye West moment in the Kanyeverse? It’s not my favorite moment but it is by far the most iconic.
The beginning of his legacy. One of the pettiest things America had seen up to that point. Oh, how naive we were back then. We thought that public perception mattered to Kanye. That he would be CANCELLED or shamed from the limelight because he would realize what he’d done and apologize. We foolishly believed he would feel remorse for stealing the spotlight.
He ain’t built like that. This was a warning shot. A sign of things to come. Even President Obama calling him a “jackass” couldn’t slow him down.
There is one anecdote I always come back to that I think sums up his mentality best. Somebody had claimed to make a diss track about him, and when Kanye was notified, he said that it made him happy. When asked why he would be happy at somebody saying awful things about him, he replied, “because they’re talking about me.”
Is Kanye’s behavior unhinged pettiness or is this all a calculated marketing tactic? It’s both. Personality turned performance art. A constant spectacle. We’ll never know, just as ‘Ye intended.